Panzer Pope: there it booted every one on my friends list too.
B_A_D: yeah
Panzer Pope: sorry but if you havent noticed by what i was saying i was refering to being intrested sexually as well. as i said befor i like all of you. i dont know if its comforting, but in the least theres one person out there. and i bet there are others that are just too shy to say so.
B_A_D: Then why doesn't anyone ever want me?
B_A_D: Callan wants to hold my hand.
B_A_D: Zac's ditching me.
B_A_D: you wanted alaurea na draven.
B_A_D: I've never been able to illict want or desire in someone.
B_A_D: I feel it for other people... a lot of people, even people I shouldn't.
Panzer Pope: I have always desired you. i dont express things in words well so i never realy have. and my actions dont speek well either. i have proven that i should not have multipul relations, and thats fine with me. i dont know why i choose alaurea, but in alot of ways i wish i didn't. all i know is that i desire you for you all of it. i just didnt relize how strongly till it was far too late. im sorry for hurting you soo much i just want to make you as happy as i can now.
B_A_D: but yet, it's raven who gets your blood pumping.
B_A_D: like amber gets zac hot
B_A_D: And random acrobat girls get callan
B_A_D: and eric wants raven
B_A_D: etc
Panzer Pope: hun you get it going alot more. im just too afraide to do anything.
B_A_D: dude 4 months of go time to do things.
B_A_D: you did raven.
B_A_D: 6 years before that, never realy into anything
B_A_D: except kinda a little that time with alaurea
B_A_D: and -she- involved me more than you did.
Panzer Pope: thats cause from past experiances whenever i get sexual with you i tend to freak you right out. and it bugs you for quite some time. i dont know where my boundries are, and i dont want to hurt you so i just do nothinf
B_A_D: So what about when we didn't have boundaries?
B_A_D: wide shoulders, big arms, no tits, tummy poof, hips, butt and jiggle fat thighs...
Panzer Pope: when we didn't i wasn't here and i had managed to fuck things up damn good befor i got a chance to test thouse boundries. remember the txting, i serisously wanted to do some of them
Panzer Pope: trust me you are not as bad as you think you are. no one realy wants t accept that there good enough. your thinking too much and making yourself belive that your unattractive, you are not unatractive at all. and anyone who thinks other wise is retarded
B_A_D: Well then why the hell can't i ever illicit the kind of desire people feel for raven, or you, or alaurea, or elis or anyone.
B_A_D: or amber.
B_A_D: Like seriously.... some guy who only texts me when he's kinda horny/masterbating met raven for like 10 seconds and asks about her......
Panzer Pope: if you ask me thats realy sketchy. but who am i to judge. i dont realy know how alot of people go about it. all i do is become friends with people then go from there if theres an intrest. i dont mean i do it spasificly to date/ be with someone but things esclate from there sometimes.
B_A_D: Nigel sits home alone.... all the time.... I can't get a response if i try.
B_A_D: I mean fuck, I've never even been called sexy or attractive or any of that lust shit from -you-.
B_A_D: And we have similar sex drives.
B_A_D: Callan, who's apprently in love with me, has dreams where he holds my hand -_-.
B_A_D: I walk down the street with anyone and there are people checking them out.
B_A_D: Whereas I get i.d. and people mistake me for a 12 year old.
Panzer Pope: iv never said alot of that realy to anyone. as i said i dont do words well. and holding hands is a big step for some people. everyone has diffrent ways of expressing there love be it by speech or actions.
B_A_D: I'm not talking love...
B_A_D: i'm talking desire.
B_A_D: No one wants to fuck me.
B_A_D: unless it's convient
B_A_D: or just there.
B_A_D: But there's no DESIRE.
B_A_D: everyone talks about these hot -need to have you moments-
B_A_D: i got none....
B_A_D: I might be the only girl in SJ you, andrew, drew, and koko haven't slept with.
Panzer Pope: how many people do you think iv slept with?
B_A_D: more than me ?
B_A_D: like 20 ? maybe ?
B_A_D: you are severly out slutted by andrew drew and koko
Panzer Pope: and trust me i want to sleep with you. but again im afraid of hurting you. and its not cause your are convineant or just there. i seriously want to be with you, and wake up with you. i dont know how to explaine desire i only know how to show it.
Panzer Pope: and its honnestly more like 10or 11 people
Panzer Pope: no 13
B_A_D: 13 not me people.
Panzer Pope: yeah i know.
B_A_D: I have not had a single partnership not end with me being ditched for someone else
B_A_D: someone hotter.
B_A_D: nigel ditched me for some one ONLINE.
B_A_D: I have to -try- to get people to have sex with me
B_A_D: or work them up to it, no one just wants to
Panzer Pope: I would like to ask you to give me a chance again, i want to show you that i wont ditch you for someone elce. cause as a partner i dont want anyone elce. but i know thats not going to happen. if i know your intrested and that i wont be hurting you by being there you would not have to work up anything. hell i would hope to work you up.
B_A_D: dude then why are you always going home with raven?
B_A_D: in highschool alaurea instigated most of our stuff
Panzer Pope: i dont know cause i know shes ok with it. i know shes intrested in me. i know you kinda are but again i dont want to push anything that may upset you, i dont know where i stand in that respect with you.
Panzer Pope: not when i was alone with you, i belive i started the istagating well on my own befor ever hanging out with her
Panzer Pope: i know that wassnt good for you or good memories and im sorry for that.
B_A_D: It's not that
B_A_D: It's just fucking hard to deal with
B_A_D: Like you having to get up and leave the room around alaurea or raven
B_A_D: or use all this restraint etc
Panzer Pope: trust me its not easy not to act on what i want to do when im around you. but at the same time i want to be as close to you as i can. for as long as i can. iv almost kissed you a million times. the only thing stoping me is the memories of hurting you. and making you cry cause of what i do.
Panzer Pope: my thing with them is i know they wont be harmed by it. so its quite hard to hold back.
B_A_D: So then what's the reason for there being nothing there when there would be no harm?
B_A_D: Even when I was cool and wanted it, things went no where, you went to them.
B_A_D: Showed up to nigel's door in a zip down dress, stalkings and heels after a 4 hour bus ride to see him. "hey." :walks off:
B_A_D: Try to talk sexy to callan, it's something about hand holding.
B_A_D: message zac and it's somehting about amber.
B_A_D: I can't win
Panzer Pope: give me a chance you can win. you have no idea how much i think about you. and i wont be going to anyone elce.
B_A_D: dude 3 times....
Panzer Pope: yeah i know
B_A_D: It's not your fault, I'm just not the person who gets that kind of response.
Panzer Pope: no you should be. im just the fucking idiot who decided to wonder around when what i was looking for wa always there
B_A_D: you can't fake attraction or desire
B_A_D: you can grow to love someone over time, but you can't learn to desire them.
Panzer Pope: i havent lerned to desire you. i have always desired you deeply. what iv lerned is the emotional connection, and what that means to me. the desire is still there everyday its there.
B_A_D: When have you ever expressed desire/
Panzer Pope: im preety sure it was preety evadent back in school. and via txts while we were dateing. i want to now, i want to throw you onto your bed and rip your close off and make you cum. but at this point im afaide even if i kissed you you would push me away. and it would make another gap between us. so the most iv managed to do was hold your hand.
B_A_D: but you wedge a giant gap between us with alaurea/raven
B_A_D: and alarger gape still between you and alaurea with raven.
B_A_D: you can't jut keep discounting the huge role attraction plays in this
Panzer Pope: no im not. i was attracted to them. but that dose not mean i was not attreacted to you as well
we were dateing. but ill throw something out there, some odd question in the moment. and i use that to gague you. as i said i dont know where i stant so i cant just act
Panzer Pope: god knows im overthinking it but id rather over think this than end up with noting. but truse me iv wanted to more than you now.
Panzer Pope: know
B_A_D: ?
Panzer Pope: in other words iv wanted to act on my desires with you, but i get syked out thinking ill hurt you, or that ill be pushed away.
Panzer Pope: i tell myself i shoulden't do this cause of what iv done in the past. that i dont deserve to be with you. but i still want to be there

z

" *rubs softly and smooches* jebus woman, you are sexy. the Things I would do if you were local :p"

"*kisses cheek gently*"

"*presses eagerly against you, closing my mouth against you and suckling softly, runningmy tongue up and down to brush against you in quick little passes*"

rare smile these days

"That, and I can help sate your libido for at least a little while til my fragile bones break, that just comes with being a good host and all that."

Fem Fest 2010

Fem Fest 2010
Originally uploaded by B_A_Dxxx88

Femfest is a celebration of female artist this year to raise money for Barry House a local shelter. So come out for a great night of music, side show, and dancing!
Starts at 7pm
At the Gorsebrook Saint Mary's University

Performers include
-Miss Molotov
-Shannay Smith
-The Keats
-DJ Goldilocks
-And MORE!

It will be $2 at the door or a quality garment donation

There will be door prizes, and all proceeds raised will go to the Barry House, a local women's shelter

OLD PPK the PMS

Jopa: great garbanzo dude, I'm going to blow my forking top if people don't stop saying such stupid shiitake. I am so sick of people trotting out wholesale accommodation of their insecurities as feminist.

IJDI: hey, sorry to have called you out on that thread. I could just see that everyone was going a little internet crazy and it wasn't a productive argument anymore. vegfoodie is totally wrong and I think she's probably just backtracking on how judgmental she was and saying that it's just her feelings on her personal experience.

anyway, everything you said was totally right, i think she just doesn't know how to have a discussion on the internet, so no amount of rational debate was going to make her see that she was wrong.

undersweptrug:Creepy stalker breathing!

We definitely need to find some sexy boys.

USR:I see you!
URS again!:Hmmm... I just noticed this little section of the board.

I posted something, in the District 9 thread. But you'll just have to get used to the fact that I'm a lurker, honey. The Patty board is the only place I've ever posted with any regularity - and I haven't even posted there in several months.

alfre-do: hey - can't find your email but the zine is done and i'm trying to get off of my asparagus about it. Send me your address and I'll get a copy of each in the mail to you shortly.

Thanks again!

Sarah

Pamela <3!:subject: GOD: wait til James Lee sees your thread. She's been doing nothing but adding anti choice republican filth to this site for a week.

i liked it though. smile

slodki: what is your avatar of? i know it is of your but what limbs are where?

Barbie: subject: did you....
ever here from the cute wizard boy?
barbie: subject re: did you..
i'm sorry. i was hoping he'd call you

kmouse: corn waffles
Here's the recipe in the book which will yield 6 9"x9" waffles.

7 cups regular oats
8-9 cups water
1 cup cornmeal
1/4 cup oil
2 tsp salt
1/2 cup dates or 1/4 cup honey (use agave)
2 TB vanilla or maple extract

Stir all ingredients together in bowl. Blend 3 cups of batter at a time for 15 seconds and pour into another bowl. Repeat procedure until all batter is blended. Prepare waffle iron by brushing lightly with oil. Close lid and preheat on high 5-8 minutes. When iron is hot, sprinkle with sesame seeds on bottom for easy removal and enhanced flavor. Pour 1 3/4 cup batter over seeds and sprinkle more seeds on top of batter. Close lid and bake for 10-12 minutes. Cool waffle. Before freezing or stacking place saran wrap or waxed paper between waffles.

*I think this makes too much so I've modified the recipe to make about 3 round belgian waffles.

1 3/4 cup oats
2 cups water
1/4 cup cornmeal
1/8 cup oil
1/2 tsp salt
1/8 cup agave or 4-5 large dates, pitted
1 TB vanilla extract

I just put all this in the blender and blitz for 15 seconds.

Pamela!:BAD-

You are so sweet! I got my package today. You have been through a lot lately and you still manage to be sweet and kind. Thank you so much. I hope things look up for you!
Pamela

Isa: sub: pics of me!

Can you take them off your flickr? I look like shiitake. Thanks.
isa: re: pics of me!
B_A_D wrote:

You don't look that bad!
I got four of them, not sure if their are any others.

Thanks a lot!

HD: Gathering 2.0
I ticked the box on the gathering registration indicating that I had room, so I think the organizers might be arranging the allocations. I don't want to make any promises and screw up their arrangement if they've already paired me up with someone. Did you fill in that bit, too?

Esme: sub: we saw
we're just letting it sit right now.

mike and jordan are together this weekend, so neither of them is likely to be on anytime soon.

but thanks for reporting it!

debya: sub sorry!!
I deleted your response to Isa's new person post. I totally need sleep and misread it. I thought it said it was for new people.

You can hate.

Sorry!

Debya: cheap places to stay subject
Thanks for your suggestion. I've added it to the master list and deleted your post to keep things tidy in the thread.

Best,
Debya

joannalovesyou:
awww you are so sweet!

i don't want you to feel as if you have to get us anything, we are doing great! but i know how it is with cute baby stuff, so if you just can't help yourself, we love brightly colored soft things. if it makes you say "awww," it will probably make us say "awww," too.

address removed

smooch!

HD: just wondering...
Yeah, I just saw her this last weekend at a friend's birthday party. To be honest, we don't talk much since the roadtrip, but I don't really want to talk about the whole situation. But she seems to be doing okay. As okay as she ever is, in any case.

Brian

HD again:
Just click "resign". I think it may end when both of us pass twice without playing, but "resign" is quicker.

bt: I forgot I wanted to give you my phone number!!

:::added to skype if i need it:::

<3
Katie

elouise: Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I mailed your CDs today. Who knows when you'll get them since we're clear across the continent from each other, but they're on the way!

many more swap partners and address i should back up but i think they are all outdated

PArty moments of confusion

Seriously, Party's identity issues are expanding.
First he was a lap dog, ok sure fine.

Then a cat or cat-o-weiler?

now he's a parrot or perhaps Rot-a-rot?

Don't know if you can tell based on these pictures, but this is Party my 80lbs Rottweiler sitting on my shoulder.

After slowly sliding himself over the back of my chair, from the couch 3 feet away, to slowly climb onto the top of this chair to drape himself over my shoulders before finally kicking his barely touching the couch feet and pulling himself onto the back of the chair/my head.


photo details

Nanakon [ ⑨ ] is "THE STRONGEST".
[00:54] B_A_D: Also I am in the living room
[00:55] Nanakon [ ⑨ ]: Well you're in a tactically unsound position, it's your fault.
[00:55] B_A_D: T.T
[00:58] Nanakon [ ⑨ ]: You must learn to fortify your position, nomatter where you are.
[01:01] B_A_D: evidently
[01:02] Nanakon [ ⑨ ]: Well just be thankful it wasn't a glitter attack, or you would have been done for.
[01:05] B_A_D: true enough